A Dead Washer….And Burning the Past

Two Poems About Being Ready for the Future

For the Dead Washer in my Basement

This week, a repairman came to fix you
because you made noises of a rocket ship
every time you spun,
because you gave me codes of an uneven load
no matter what was within your bin to wash.
This week, the man that came to repair you
said there was no repairing you,
it was time for something new.
So I went to the store and bought
a new washer-dryer pair,
something smarter than me,
with downloadable programs
and steam and jets and shine.
This week, I heard from a girl
words a child should never have to speak:
I’m sorry for my mother.
And it reminded me of why I made the decision
11 years ago to quit the alcohol.
It made me wonder how many times
my kids had to utter those same words
while I was drinking.
But now I am sober and sane and happy.
We all have been the villain in someone’s story,
haven’t we? And we all have been the victim.
Today, I am done with both of them,
villain and victim.
In my trash pile to burn tomorrow
are all the beginnings of my poems —
all the hand-written first drafts
that ended up edited and saved,
printed out again in final form
in my 3 ring binders.
I am saying goodbye to the past.
Yes, sometimes we are the villain,
sometimes the victim, and sometimes
the past is too heavy to carry.
Sometimes the damage is so great,
there is nothing left to do —
no fixing it, Time to say goodbye,
reach out for something new.
Like the pair of machines taking your place.
Who knows what the…